If you want to be with a girl, tell her. Don't assume she will wait around. Some girls have trouble picking up hints anyway.

Jesus, you are so good.

I don’t always understand Spanish right away, but You give me understanding.

I’m not in a relationship, but You give me peace to not rush it & be fulfilled in knowing You alone.

I have alot on my plate, but You give me rest.

I can be terrible about judging people, but You remind me I’m not perfect either.

I can’t see my parents as much as I like, but You give me friends at college who love/care for my well being.

I think consistently how I can get all my school work done, but You give me the time to get it done when I put You first.

I can get caught up in my characters while acting on stage, but You tell me that its through You I have the blessing of spreading Your name through a play.

I worry if I can make it through this semester, but You tell me that You are the God who works through the impossible.

Through people like me who have the smallest of faith.

“Yet he did not waver through unbelief regarding the promise of God, but was strengthened in his faith and gave glory to God, being fully persuaded that God had power to do what he had promised.” - Romans 4:20-21

I love jobs that exhaust me :)

Right now I am at home instead of at girl staff because I am trying to get rid of my sore throat that I got last night. And I am determined to get over it so I can start working again tomorrow. :) But anyhow, I would just like to say that God is awesome. Here is a few reasons why from my first week of camp...

This summer I am the recreation director & it freaked me out to be in charge for the first time last week but all in all, I think it was a good first three days of rec considering it was our first time doing different games with the kids. On the first day we have a scavenger hunt & I remember I was at the climbing wall & I was just checking in on a group to make sure everything was running smoothly. Then a little girl, who couldn't have been older than 1st or 2nd grade got my attention & said..."You're...you're really pretty." One of the cutest things ever! Especially because during the day, its sometimes hard to feel like that about myself because I don't really wear makeup. But for a little girl, because we all know kids LOVE to tell the truth & don't sugarcoat anything, to say that to me, can you say confidence boost? :D

Another reason is still in the process each day. :) This past week was a different kind of challenge. I always love it when I get the opportunity to sing in chapel, which in the past was like three times in a week out of an eight. My friend Jarod is in charge of the band this summer, & he is doing an awesome job I must say, & he asked if I would mind singing Monday night so of course I said i wouldn't. Then Tuesday afternoon chapel came around & he asked me again because our only other regular girl singer didn't feel comfortable enough with the words yet. So basically what happened is that I sang eight out of eight times last week in chapel, even by myself on some of the songs. Jarod said it might continue to be that way until girls get the courage to sing. Even though I love singing, it is completely different doing it day after day because a few times this week I messed up some lyrics & didn't feel so confident in my abilities to lead worship. But I have a feeling God is teaching me that it isn't about how I sound, its about who I am singing to.

Those are just two really cool things from last week. Please pray for my voice, I need it for rec, worship, performing a skit every night, & of course to minister to the children.

Sometimes you just have to set goals for yourself.

So I’m making a list of all the things I want to accomplish this summer before I go back to school. Which is ten weeks. And I must say I am very excited about the goals I’ve set for myself. Here are just a few…

*What to read: finish Crazy Love, Radical, The Great Divorce, Arsenic and Old Lace

*What to pray about: Ministry opportunities on NGU campus/theatre department

*Work on With & Without a Home script

*Get a second hole in each ear

*Become more healthy

And this is just what I want to do when I’m not working at camp. Who knows, I might even add some more.

I want to marry my best friend.

1 John 3:20

"This then is how we know that we belong to the truth, and how we set our hearts at rest in His presence whenever our hearts condemn us."

There is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ.

I'm a horrible Lukewarm person.

I have been reading Francis Chan's book Crazy Love lately since coming home for summer break & I must say that my heart is heavy with what I have learned about myself from the past two chapters I have read.

Chapter Four talks about being lukewarm & what that looks like. A characteristic of being a lukewarm "Christian" is that they assume they are good soil. And this past year at college, that is exactly what I thought of myself. I realized that I compared myself to my friends who are not as "godly" as I am. What a horrible person I am! I thought during the past couple of weeks that since I am stronger than some of my other friends, I must be a pretty good Christian girl. I deserve a slap in the face for thinking this for so long. I could not honestly say that I want to share with Christ; in the power of His resurrection, in His sufferings, and becoming like Him in His death. (Philippians 3:10)

The chapter went on talking about how lukewarm people do not want to be saved from their sin, just from the penalty of their sin. Chan started comparing lukewarm to Pharisees, how we compare ourselves to the secular world saying we are grateful that even though we are not radical for Jesus, we are better than the guy who is down our street. Lukewarm people's lives wouldn't look much different if they stopped believing in God. They are not that much different from the unbeliever. Wow.

Then I got to chapter five today, "Serving Leftovers to a Holy God". Chan immediately said after opening up the chapter, "Churchgoers who are 'lukewarm' are not Christians. We will not see them in heaven." This might be stupid of me to just now realize this but I did always wonder what would happen to those who were lukewarm & the end of time came for them. But now I get it. The verse in Revelation where it says that God is going to spit those out who are in the middle of hot & cold.Lukewarm 'Christians' are not going to be saved when the day of judgement comes. If I say I love Him but don't do what He commands, I do not truly love Him. Scary to even think about, isn't it? Of course the beauty of God's grace covers our mistakes & attempts, if it didn't, we wouldn't called it amazing grace. God is a forgiving God, He wants us to succeed & wants us to actively pursue Him. To say that if we mess up that we were never truly a Christian is untrue because then no one would enter the Kingdom. God knows that we mess up, even as His children who have been cleansed by His blood because we are still, sadly, human.

What should really matter to a believer of Christ is their relationship with God. Not the major we are working towards, not our summer job, not even our future spouse, but actively pursuing the Creator. Because He is what matters in the end, He is eternal. God commands us to love, to put the 1 Corinthians version of love in practice every day when it comes to Him and our relation to others.

What I have come to realize is this. I believe my first year of college, I was not actively pursuing the Lord. I did not swim up the stream daily, and because of that, I have slowly started to drift downstream. Its not like I have done anything wrong in the eyes of the world. I haven't used foul language, started to drink or smoke, or anything BIG like that. But my heart was not completely focused on God, I didn't meet with Him daily as I use to. Probably not alot of other people recognize it, but I know where my heart is & how much it needs to be centered more on God's love.

Not sure why I wanted to share this but if I could say anything to you guys as my siblings in Christ, it would be Don't assume you are good soil. We should never compare ourselves to others when it comes to who is godlier than the other. Pride comes before the fall. We should always look to God when we measure ourselves.